I have to confess, I wasn’t particularly excited for you when I felt your approach. The year prior had been so transformative that I didn’t know what to expect from you. I vividly remember 365 days ago, standing in my friend’s Astoria apartment on New Year’s Eve, declaring that I didn’t think 2017 would be “my year.” I thought you would be quickly filed away as a lost year between 2016 and 2018. Little did I know, you have been one of the most wonderfully riveting years of my life.
You brought me wisdom, strength, closure, friendship, and adventure. You brought me to boundless beautiful places outside of this city. You brought me many tears of joy and sadness. You closed many chapters of my world that needed resolution — ones that I was too afraid to close myself. You have been a year of resolution for my soul, and for that I am abundantly grateful. For the doors that have closed this year will inevitably blow open windows in 2018 that I have yet to lay eyes on.
Yesterday, I was standing in the midst of beautiful chaos. Today, I’m standing in the midst of a world I don’t yet know. Thank you for providing me the strength I need to walk blindly into 2018 — a year filled with uncertainty, unemployment, and non-parental health insurance. Without your your twists and turns, I wouldn’t be ending this year a completely different woman that I was twelve months ago.
I don’t think I’m ready to say goodbye to you yet, but hasn’t that been your purpose? To teach me that there are people, places, and moments that must leave, change, or end even when you’re not quite ready? Thank you for being a hard shove in a brand new direction of independence and responsibility. I will miss you so.
All my love,