net worth = six dollars + $2.99 shipping

personal

A year ago, almost to the day, an envelope arrived at my home in Connecticut (creepy) from a student named “Jackie” asking if I would sign my autograph on the enclosed blank sheets of paper for a “Broadway Autograph Collection” project at her school called “Monte Special Education School.”

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Obviously, I was smart enough to recognize that this wasn’t legit.  The handwriting was very clearly written by an adult trying to disguise themselves as a child.  Better yet, it was stamped with the name of the school, which I promptly looked up along with the return address and discovered did not exist but, hey, it was flattering that some random human walking around this world wanted my autograph.

I sat on sending something back; on the off-chance that all the conclusions I had drawn were wrong and this was in fact a student named Jackie from a Special Education school asking me to participate in their Broadway project and I did not respond, I would have felt badly (not that I would have ever found out).  Also, at least one of my ensemble girls had also received the same letter, and felt comfortable sending something back,  so I threw them a bone, and I signed the signature I was using on the CATS company posters (not my signature for legit documents, credit cards, etc., because that would be foolish).

To be completely honest, I forgot this even happened.  In a weird series of events, I happened to google myself this morning in hopes of adding some undiscovered gems to my website.  If you Google “Tara Llewellyn Actress” the third result that comes up on Page 2 is this:

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A recently expired eBay listing of my very professional signature (equipped with a small heart and all) available for $6.00 (plus $2.99 shipping) sold by prettyboy45220, an eBay member since 2003 (I find it impressive that Jackie is experienced enough to have had an eBay account since Outkast’s “Hey Ya” was number one on the charts and can still manage to snag a spot in Monte Special Education school’s Class of 2017).

Mama Llew and I haven’t stopped laughing for the last half hour.  Thank you, prettyboy45220, for not only giving me a chuckle today but an inevitable title for a chapter in my forthcoming memoir somewhere down the line in my career.

xo,

T

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